Planning the Perfect Valentine's Day
by Ronnee Ruselle
Many people today think that Valentine's day is too commercialized and some choose to ignore it altogether. It's understandable, but upon thinking about it, I realized that it may just be a day that we really need. As couples in a busy life with so much going on, we rarely find the time to devote an entire day to showing the one we love just how much we love and appreciate him/her especially when we're parents. Once those beautiful bundles of love come along, we're so busy trying to be the perfect parents and getting by, that our relationships can sometimes suffer. It's so important that we take the opportunity to renew our love and to remember the beautiful things in each other that made us fall in love in the first place.
Valentine's day is the perfect opportunity for it. There is no other day that is devoted to simply showing how much we love that special someone in our lives. It's also a very important day for many who wish to propose to or marry their darling.
The amount of effort your partner goes to on Valentine's day generally is accepted as being evidence of how much they love you so don't skimp on showing your feelings for your amore. Even if your relationship is a little rocky, a good amount of effort on Valentine's Day and genuine expression of your love for them can help heal rifts. Below are some helpful hints that you can use to make the whole day special for your love or part or it.
Valentine's breakfast
Set a nice tray ready for breakfast in bed. Alternatively, set the breakfast table with knives, forks, spoons - whatever you need, napkins, lovely plates, bowls and glassware. Remember a small bouquet of flowers makes it extra special regardless of whether it's for a male or female.
You could awaken your special person with a single red rose with a tag attached to it inviting him/her to join you for breakfast. If you're serving breakfast in bed, the tag could invite them to prepare for a special surprise so they have time to run to use the bathroom, wash hands etc. - whatever they may wish to so as not to interrupt their lovely breakfast.
Possible ideas for the breakfast:
- A breakfast fruit smoothie made with bananas, milk, honey and vanilla
- A bowl of fresh strawberries or large chopped fruit pieces plus vanilla yoghurt for dipping
- Cinnamon toast or a lovely French pastry
- Ham and eggs or perhaps some nice scrambled eggs served with a little bacon and garnished with a sprig of parsley
During the day
If one or both of you goes to work, then this is the perfect opportunity to let your partner receive little suprises during the day. See the article "Gone...but not forgotten" for some great ideas. Alternatively, you could organise for some flowers, balloons or a special bottle of his/her fave drink to be delivered (this can be enjoyed when you get together later in the evening).
Evening
Of course there are plenty of things you can do to make the evening meal special. It's up to you how much money you wish to spend or how far you want to go with it. You may choose to have your special daytime delivery accompanied by an invite to meet you somewhere special that has a meaning for the two of you with a catered meal and the whole shebang or you may prefer to have an intimate dinner for two at home.
Be sure to prepare for your romantic dinner well in advance, so you have very little to do at the last minute and can enjoy the dinner with your sweetheart. If you have children, you could plan to have a special late supper, let them stay overnight with the grandparents or find an outside sitter for the evening. You also want to ensure that there are no other interruptions as they are definite mood-killers so put the answering machine on so that it answers the calls silently or take the phone off the hook. Make sure that you both have your cell phones switched off and you may even consider putting a 'do not disturb' sign on the door to avoid doorknockers. If one of you must have it on for emergency purposes, then perhaps you could have them off while you enjoy your dinner or at the very least ensure they are on vibrate.
It's best to be seated closely so that you have a more intimate atmosphere so either choose a smaller sized table or seat yourselves near to each other at a larger table. Use your best china, crystal and silverware, and your finest tablecloth.
Candles and flowers are a wonderful accompaniment or some other sort of lovely, soft mood lighting. Be careful to use candles that aren't scented or that don't smell or smoke too much when extinguished so as not to interfere too much with the aroma of the meal. Scented flowers are okay - fresh flowers are always the way to go, but ensure that their scent is subtle.
Ensure that you have suitable mood music playing - something soothing with a relaxing and intimate tune. At this stage, you may prefer music without lyrics to allow you both the opportunity of enjoying each other's conversation. Ensure that the music is not too loud as to drown out the evening. You want the evening to be intimate and romantic and this is not achieved with loud sounds.
The Menu
Special occasions are not the best time to try a new recipe. If they go wrong, it can be upsetting and ruin your evening so either practice your menu in advance, or stick with something you cook well that's simple and tasty. If you can only make baked beans on toast, then get the meal catered - but don't lie and claim that you cooked it. Even the best cooks may choose to have the meal catered so that you can eat together without fuss and mess. Ensure that you serve the food up in an attractive manner so it looks appealing.
If your specialty is something that you feel is too plain to cook, then perhaps you can dress it up. A bolognaise can be made simply. Add a lovely checkered table cloth, a good bottle of wine, garlic bread and a lovely salad and voila! You have a genuine Italian themed meal. Get yourself some romantic Italian music and your 'basic' meal becomes a specialty as well as setting a mood. If you'd like something super spectacular, doing an internet search will provide you with a huge amount of great ideas and recipes to use.
Being the perfect Valentine
Providing any amount of good food and wine can be spoiled if you get to dinner and show either bad manners or become a poor companion.
Here are some helpful hints:
- If your lady needs to remove a coat, then assist her by gently holding the coat from behind while she takes it off and then putting it away for her. If you are both arriving and you have a coat to remove, allow the lady to remove hers first.
- If you're the gentleman, then you may wish to pull out the chair for the lady, but push it in gently at the same speed with which she sits and refill her glass when it's a little way from the bottom rather than after a few sips.
- Don't eat with your mouth open and wait until you've finished what's in your mouth before you speak. Regardless of what you see in the movies, eating with your fingers is not attractive unless the food is specifically designed to be eaten that way and then it should be with one hand only - preferably the left hand.
- Be careful about wearing a fragrance that is too strong.
- Remember to look your partner in the eye and show interest in the conversation.
Do yourself a favour and learn a little something that will make the meal special. Perhaps you'd like to learn how to say a special line to your love in French - the language of love - or you may wish to memorize a special poem that tells how you feel about him/her. You could even write it yourself! Again, searching the internet will reveal many love poems to choose from and even some sites will help you compose one.
Senses and Effects that add to your day.
Pink brings about a feeling of romance and red brings about a feeling of passion so you may wish to start the evening or the day with pink tones, moving to deeper tones of pink and then red as you go through the evening or perhaps a mixture of the two.
Fabrics that invite a person to touch them have a romantic or sensual feel to them. Smooth or soft fabrics are ideal for such a day as valentine's day.
Soft surfaces and padding are wonderful so if picnicking, use a soft or well padded blanket and perhaps even a few cushions to sit on. Extra soft pillows, feathers, flower petals or anything that adds softness to the bedroom is a lovely ending to an evening together for any married couple - but be careful not to overdo it or to mix too many themes together.
Subtle or subdued lighting, music and scents keep the evening going on a romantic theme. Should you wish to end the evening on a more sexy note, you can change the music to tunes with a deeper tone and maybe a slightly faster or slower beat depending upon the impression you wish to make.
A wonderful way to set the theme for your Valentine's day or evening is to base it upon different areas of your love for each other. You may choose to begin with fun and humour emphasizing how much fun the two of you have together and moving to a more relaxed and romantic theme with gifts or dinner moving onto the most intimate area of your relationship last of all. Whatever you do, remember to fill it with things that your partner loves, rather than thinking of what you would love because they could be very different.
Remember that Valentine's day does not have to be about physical love. It's the emotional side of the relationship that withstands all and should be the basis to the message you share with your sweetheart. Think about all of the wonderful things you share and the ways you love him or her as well as the things your love likes most - use those things to make the day special.
Happy Valentine's Day!!